My Last Chance

I feel the sparks of my hate beginning to reverberate from my chest.
I see the signs
but at the least I do my best
I hold my breath and cross my fingers.
The pain is unbearable
I want it all to end.
Sheltering myself
Defending my life
and hoping for less
My knife so beautiful
The blood
Copper and fresh
On my wrist
Stains of tears
Scars from the past
Thoughts that never leave
Love unexistent
Pain so real
I want it more
lead me on to the unknown
so than this hell could end
Oblivion so curious
Never brave
Always demised
Loud and screaming
My pleads for sanity
No one here...
My hero...
Blood..
Death so alive
Approachable
My last chance.

Far

How far must you go before you can see
Just how miserable you make me.
Does it seem fair when all you do is beg and plead
When your way of showing love is by hurting me.
What makes it right when you say you need me
but truthfully you dont even believe.
Is it real when the bruises and blood appear
Or must you show me more.
When it is all said and done
where will you be when everything destroys me.
Life so disposable
mediocre and obselete.
Who were you to tell me
just how demeaning I can be.
where is my home
when there is no where that I belong.
Just how far must you go before you break me
so you can walk all over me just the same.
Who was I to pretend
Use to be so much
It all was lost
when I thought so much more would come.
Fake smiles
So many tears
But who are you to say it will get better
when nothing has ever changed?